My life in sex: I have always loved spanking womens bottoms

Away from spanking, I’m a light-hearted, mild-mannered chap

This morning, I visited my next-door neighbour and spanked her. Afterwards, I drove down the motorway and spanked another woman, whom I visit twice a week. Tonight, I’m having a first meeting – just drinks and a chat – with a woman who wants to be spanked. Then, tomorrow, I’m driving to Plymouth to see another woman whom I discipline regularly. There are others, too.

I’m a graphic designer (freelance, hence the daytime freedom) in my late 40s, and I have loved spanking women’s bare bottoms for as long as I can remember. I’m not a sadist, or even sure it’s about feeling dominant. Away from spanking, I’m a light-hearted, mild-mannered chap who finds the notion of controlling or imposing my will on anyone absolutely abhorrent.

I think what motivates me is the experience of doing something to another adult that ought not to be happening. Then there is the basic enjoyment of the act itself: seeing, touching, enjoying a woman’s bare bottom; pinkening her buttocks with the flat of my hand. Is it a sexual release? It can sometimes lead to sex. But in truth, I’m not sexually attracted to all of the women I spank.

Some girlfriends have been keener than others, and I’ve modified my expectations accordingly. But after 30 years of putting women over my knee, I’ve come to realise that for many it proves cathartic. I’ve had a lot of sex in my life, but am finding that intercourse is far less important to me than spanking.

Each week, a reader tells us about their sex life. Want to share yours? Email sex@guardian.com.

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